What Were You Thinking?
by JimberlyShipper
Summary: So Rachel finds out Finn talked to a recruiter. They discuss it. Pairing, Finchel, mentions of Klaine. Based on the scenes for when glee resumes in Jan.


_**Disclaimer: The characters of glee are not mine. This is written as my reaction to FInn telling Schue he'd talked to a recruiter. OMG. So yeah. Other than that, three aren't any spoilers than for any aired episodes. I just don't know that I want to see Finners going into the army. He's so talented omg. Anyway, Rachel decides she wants to talk him out of it. **_

What Were You Thinking?

By Julia

Rachel was in the room when Finn Hudson, her boyfriend, was telling Mr. Schuester that she was possibly going into the army. She could not believe he was going to do that! He was so talented and had so much ahead of him! Why was he thinking about going into the army? He was so talented, he could get into any school he wanted. She stormed out of the room, she had too many thoughts about this. She was going to have to formulate them before she tried to talk to him.

The next day, Finn was taking her out to Breadstix. This was going to be when he was supposed to be telling her that he'd talked to a recruiter. She had had a talk with Blaine Anderson while she was getting ready to go.

Blaine got to her house, and her dads let him on up. They liked Blaine, they thought he was a nice guy. Blaine came into her room, and said, "Rachel, hey. What's up that you needed me to come over like this?"

The diva in training came out of her bathroom. She was half dressed, she was wearing a skirt and a shirt, but she wasn't so sure about the shirt so it was unbuttoned. "You have to help me, Blaine! Finn wants to go into the army. He's supposed to be telling me tonight, at Breadstix." Rachel said, as she pulled up her hair. "Up or down? What do you think of this outfit?" She asked.

Looking her over, Blaine mused. "Well, I think down, but kind of wavy." He took a closer look at her outfit. "Skirt's fine, but do you have something else to go with it?" He asked.

She took off her shirt, going to her closet to hang it up. Blaine was gay, it didn't concern her that she was in her bra. He still turned away while she was looking, out of respect for Finn. She rifled through her closet. The skirt she had on was a silver pencil skirt. She held out a blue shirt, it was a silk peasant top. "What do you think of this one?"

Taking it from her, Blaine looked it over. "Yeah, that will look great." Blaine said, and she began to pull it over her head. "Now. What's this about Finn going into the army?" He asked, sitting on her bed.

Rachel went into the bathroom, to get out her curling iron. She came back to her vanity and plugged it in. She let it warm up and turned to Blaine. "I overheard him tell Mr. Schue that he talked to a recruiter."

That was news to Blaine. "What? Why is he doing that? Even thinking about that? I mean, Finn's a great singer, he could get into any school for music that he wanted." Blaine wished Finn saw the same potential in himself that everyone else did.

"I don't know. I have to talk him out of it. I mean, what if something happens like what happened to his dad?" Rachel asked. She shook her head. She was extremely worried about him. And how could they be together if he was in the army?

Blaine ran his hand through his hair, he had gelled it that day but he hadn't used as much as he usually did and it was very wavy. "Rach, that _has_ to be scary. He should be asking how you feel about this. It affects you too." He was equating the situation to himself and Kurt. What if Kurt had been thinking that? He'd feel terrible.

Rachel hadn't even _thought_ of that, which was odd to her. She was sometimes very selfish. "You're right! He _does_ have to consider how it affects me!" She said. It had never occurred to her, she was more concerned with how Finn was possibly going to die than how it would affect her, she thought that was growth.

Blaine nodded. "You're in the relationship, too, Rachel. You have a right to say it bothers you." He _definitely_ would if it was Kurt doing that to him. Not that he would, Blaine was pretty sure Kurt would never be in an outfit like that. He definitely cared too much about what he wore.

Rachel sighed. "I know that now, but I just don't know how to bring it up without hurting his feelings. I mean, his dad _did_ die in a war. I mean, what if he takes it personally? I just don't want to hurt him. I just don't want him to go. I don't want to lose him like that."

Nodding, Blaine reached over to squeeze her shoulder. It was a little awkward, he had to mostly get up. "Rach, I am sure as long as you're gentle about it, it will be fine." There was no telling for sure, Finn could sometimes get mad over things.

Picking up her curling iron, Rachel began to curl her hair. "Yeah, I hope you're right. I'm just super nervous. I also can't believe he told Mr. Schue before he told me." That had hurt her a little, even if she could kind of understand, they all cared about Mr. Schue and told him things they couldn't necessarily tell their parents about.

"Maybe he was afraid of how you would react." Blaine said, as he watched her curl her hair.

That could be true. Rachel just didn't know. "You could be right. Maybe he's just nervous. But I'm his girlfriend, he shouldn't be too scared to tell me things." She wanted to marry Finn one day, how could she if he was afraid to tell her things? She was afraid to say that out loud, though, she hadn't told Finn yet.

Blaine nodded. "That's true, too. You have to be able to discuss things." He said.

She wondered if she had a headband to go with her outfit, or a good clip. She was sure she did. "I just, I'm worried about him. And what is Carole going to say? She lost his dad in a war. Why would he _do_ that to her? She will be absolutely devastated." Rachel said, sighing.

That was certainly true. Carole was going to be pretty upset. Blaine nodded. "Yes. Carole's going to be so upset." Not to mention the rest of his family. "Burt and Kurt will too. I could see Burt being upset but fine with it if it's what Finn wants to do, especially since Burt's Ohio's newest Congressman."

Rachel didn't want to discuss how Finn's family would feel, she already knew they'd be upset. "So how do you think I should bring it up? Should I wait until dessert? Or when we get there? I want to have a nice date but I just don't know if I can sit through dinner without saying anything."

Musing, Blaine looked at her. "Not sure, Rachel. If it was Kurt and I, I would want to discuss it after dinner, so you could have a good date. But I understand your hesitation to wait."

Glancing at the clock, Rachel cried, "Oh my God, I have to get ready faster, he'll be here soon." She finished curling her hair as quickly as she could, and Blaine helped her pick out a hair clip to go with her outfit. After quickly doing some nice makeup, she was ready. "There. Thanks, Blaine, you are a great friend." Rachel said. "I'm going to hug you now."

After the hug had broken, they left Rachel's room to go down and Blaine got ready to leave. "Bye, Rachel, good luck!" He said, touching her shoulder and hollering bye to Rachel's dads.

Then a few minutes later, as Rachel was pacing, Finn arrived. She let him in almost as quickly as he rang the bell. "Hi, Finn." She said, closing the door behind him quickly.

"Hey, sweetheart. We have to go, our reservation is very soon." Finn said, as Rachel got out a coat from the hall closet.

"Ok." Rachel said, as her dads came in to say bye also. "Bye, Dad. Bye Daddy." She said, giving them both hugs.

Finn shook both of their hands, and led Rachel out to his truck. He opened the door for her, and they got all buckled in. Finn started up the truck. "So, you look very pretty, Rach." He said, giving her a smile.

Smiling briefly at him, she said, "Blaine helped. He had just left almost before you got to my house." Normally, she would have called Kurt to ask him, but she knew that she didn't want to discuss Finn's recuiter talk with him. She didn't want to upset Kurt at all.

"That's good, babe." Finn said, giving her another smile. He thought for a minute before he said, "So, Rachel, there's something I am going to be telling you at dinner. I just want you to keep an open mind, OK?" He asked her, giving her a glance as he stopped the truck at a stop sign.

She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. (Only part of her hair was pulled back by the clip.) She looked back at him, hoping to keep her cool. She was pretty nervous. "Ok. I will do my best, Finn." She said, as she tried not to grimace.

"Good, 'cause you know I love you." Finn said, smiling at her again as he started down the road again.

It didn't take long to reach Breadstix, and Finn got out to let Rachel out first, before she opened the door herself. They got out and headed into the restaraunt. Finn told them that the Hudson party was there, and they only had to wait a little bit. Once they were seated, Finn took a sip of his water, and took a deep breath. "Do you want me to tell you now?" He asked.

Her boyfriend seemed to have made her decision for her. She said, "Just tell me now, it's better to get good news or bad news out of the way." Rachel sat primly across from her boyfriend.

Finn shrugged, and said, "Ok. Well. I talked to a recruiter at school this week, Rachel. I'm thinking about joining the army." He wondered what she would say. He knew she wasn't going to be happy.

Her feelings were all in a jumble as he actually told her that he was going to leave her. In the end, that's what it amounted to for her. He was going to be leaving her. She tried not to cry. "Finn, you're going to be leaving me?" She asked.

His face scewed up in confusion. "I finally feel like I have found something that could be good for me. And I'll be fighting for my country."

This did not detur Rachel from telling him what she thought. "Finn, what if you _die_? And what is your mother going to say? She's going to be so upset if something happens to you. What are you doing? What are you _thinking_? Your father died in a war, Finn!" She tried to keep her voice down, so she didn't attract her attention.

It was true that Finn hadn't really thought about any of that. He supposed he should have. He had only been thinking that he had to do _something_ with his life, and he had thought he could follow in his father's footsteps. "Yeah, I didn't even think about that. I was thinking that I could do something meaningful with my life. My dad was in the army. He did something with his life."

"But Finn, how can I go to New York if I'm worried about you? I won't be able to do anything without worrying about you! How can you put me through that? How can you put your family through that? Your mother? She is your _mother_, Finn, and you are her only son. Yes, Kurt is, too, but she gave _birth_ to you. You can't _do_ this to her." Rachel hadn't meant to get so upset but she had.

Staring back at her, Finn wasn't surprised that she was getting so upset. He took one of her hands in his, trying to calm her down. "Rachel, nothing is official yet. All I've done is _talk_ to a recruiter. Nothing has been decided at all. You should calm down, you're going to make yourself sick." Finn said, squeezing her hand a little.

She almost yanked her hand out of his. But she didn't. She just looked at him with her eyes wide and she was shaking a little. She didn't know what to say now, and she didn't trust her voice enough to start speaking. She waited a second or two. "Finn, I just don't know how you think you can do this and have everyone in your life be OK with this." She was sure that nothing she was saying was helping at all.

"Rachel, I am not trying to hurt anyone. I just need to _do_ something. I can't stay here in Lima. I thought I could, but I can't. I thought about it, and I have to get out." Finn liked working in his step-father's shop, but the more he thought about staying in Lima while his friends got out, he was upset. He _had_ to get out. Especially if Rachel got to get out and go to New York. It was killing him.

Tears were falling down her face, and Rachel sighed. Touching his face with her free hand, she said, "Finn, you are supposed to do something amazing. I know you are meant to be great. I know you are supposed to make a difference in this world. How can you do that if you're sending yourself somewhere to get killed?" She asked, running her fingers through his hair. "Finn, please don't do this. I love you. I am scared for you." She had been thinking about it since she had heard him tell Mr. Schue.

Glancing down at the menu, Finn sighed. He wiped her tears off her face with his thumbs. "Rachel, I can't have faith in myself like you do. I don't know how. I don't know how to dream like you do. I have to do something. Please, I just need you to try and understand that. You have your singing and your acting. I know you're going to be amazing, Rachel."

That was something Rachel knew without a doubt. She also thought that Finn could do the same if he would just believe in himself. It was going to be hard to convince him. She thought for a second, trying to figure out what to say. Words were coming slow and sluggish. She said, "Finn, you can do whatever you want. You are as talented as I am. You are the hunky male lead and I am the young ingenue that everyone roots for." That was one of the first things that she had ever said to him. She still believed it to be true. "You can be the biggest star, you have the most talent in glee club besides me. You just have to believe in yourself. You have to believe you can do it." They had come a long way since the first time she'd said those words.

He looked away from her, embarrassed. He just couldn't have that confidence in himself that she did. "I would _like_ to, Rachel, I am just not sure I _can_." Finn understood she was upset. He really did.

"Yes, but again, what about your mother? You lost someone really important in your life. Your father. How could you do that to her? I can't imagine that she would want the same for you." Rachel said, letting her voice stay upset. She took a sip of her water. She could feel her throat get tired from talking. She sighed and tucked hair behind her ear. "Finn, please. just think about it."

That was the last they spoke about it for awhile. Rachel wanted her words to sink into his head. Finn sometimes needed to mull these things over. When they did speak about it again, Finn had told her that he wasn't going to go into the army. She was glad, she didn't want to have to worry about losing him. They'd figure out something for his future together.

_**Author's note: Hope this is how this goes. Seriously, why would Finn go in the army after they lost his dad? Come on. **_


End file.
